Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize