he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
