we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
