It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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