He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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