The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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