Having a random hookup so left but love u
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
