You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Randomize
