There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
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