your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize