I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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