So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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