Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
