You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
