I'm going to jail i love you
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
