I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
