Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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