I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize