We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
i would punch a child for taco bell
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
