Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Randomize
