I just pynch a tree in the face
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
