Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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