i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize