Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
