I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
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