well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
The ass gains better be worth it
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