This dress was meant to end up on your floor
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
