i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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