Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
You're so nebulous sometimes
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
