Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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