So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
