this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
