Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
