sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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