I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
