Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize