Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
You ate ashes out of my bong
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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