oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize