Kiss
Puke
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
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