Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
The uberlube is also flammable
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
