How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
