I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
smell my finger.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
