found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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