Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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