Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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