I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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