i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
