I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
