piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
