You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Randomize
