Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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