Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
