think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
